Burnt Friedman & João Pais Filipe

Moers City 2024: the megalomaniacal Superdieter has been causing chaos and despair since the '80s with his terrifying tones. Exploiting the emotionality of those weaker than him, he has enriched himself beyond all measure and, grinning maniacally, he will stop at nothing when it comes to extending his power and fulfilling his dream of total musical world dominance – HAHAHAHA! But in order to accomplish that, he will have to take Rodelberg, the last bastion of liberated sound. On May 18, he lands on the Rodelberg summit, clad in his smarmiest supervillain threads (courtesy of Camp David). Using all the cash he's siphoned out of the music economy, he commissioned a scary over-sized flying suit to be custom built for him, featuring a ballistic Botox shield. SPOOKY-SPOOKY! Alas, he didn't count on Burnt Friedman and João Pais Filipe showing up – TADAA! With their gift for modifying the global polyrhythmic constants and pushing forward into the most extreme corners of the frequency spectrum, the pair prepares to face off against the unscrupulous music crime boss. "You clowns, take this!" Superdieter growls, with a distorted grin, releasing an army of cloned verses, refrains and cheesy reverb effects from his suit compartment, which immediately head for the Rodelbarg stage, with murderous intent.
 

Alas, Friedman and Filipe hold steady, side by side, countering every last moronic stereotype with salvos of hitherto-unheard sound battens, parrying every rhythmic attempt to produce a lock-step effect with intricate micro-time shifts, eviscerating the triadic tone-clones in a crossfire of overwhelming dissonance and brutal dynamic levels – BLAMMO! ZAP! Dematerialised, atomised, ignored, the clone army of the mad music poisoner abruptly lies down, completely uninterested in the unusual sounds on the gentle green Rodelberg slopes, listening (minds slightly blown) to our two heroes. On the run, headed South, Superdieter's ballistic Botox shield goes haywire, causing him to crash, along with his entire designer wardrobe, into the froggy ponds of Bettenkamper Meer, where his body is devoured, digested and excreted by the hungry carp.

As this is happening, from the vastness of the sea there emerges a monumental white ship, from which the following words waft over on the wind: "Music expresses that which cannot be said and about which it is impossible to remain silent." The carp are certain; "The great – blubblub – Hüsch, the – blub – great Hüsch, as far as I know…". “After all, everything ends up in a stomach, even the spiritual.”